On My Mind: Finding my Way Back
Ready or not, the season of Lent is upon us. We will mark the start of this season of penitence with Ash Wednesday, which I know it falls on Valentine’s Day and there isn’t much about Ash Wednesday that feels romantic, but it makes a strange sort of sense: Ash Wednesday is part of the greatest love story of all time.
Early in John’s Gospel, Jesus encounters the Pharisee Nicodemus. This teacher of the law recognizes that Jesus is something special, someone sent by God. So Nicodemus sneaks out at night to visit Jesus and figure out who he is. Jesus tries to explain it all to him, but Nicodemus doesn’t understand. He’s a smart guy, but what Jesus is saying makes no sense to him intellectually.
So Jesus puts it in a different way: “Just as Moses lifted up the serpent in the wilderness, so must the Son of Man be lifted up, that whoever believes in him may have eternal life. For God so loved the world that he gave his only Son, so that everyone who believes in him may not perish but may have eternal life.” (John 3:14-16)
The Good News begins with God’s love – God’s immeasurable, unquenchable love. God loves us so totally and completely that God sends Godself to earth so that we might believe and trust in this love. We are meant to be changed, even transformed by this love, but it doesn’t always work, does it?
Don’t get me wrong. I love Jesus. Jesus is my savior, and I really want to walk in all his ways, but it’s hard for me to wrap my head around God’s love. How can God love me so completely? What have I done to deserve this? In my heart, I am a mixed bag at best. Yes, there is compassion, love and patience, but those virtues sit next to jealousy, judgment and selfishness, to name just a few of my sins. There are days I can hardly stand myself, let alone love myself. And Jesus wants me to believe I am loved by God? In the words of Nicodemus, ‘How can this be??’
We come to Ash Wednesday dragging all these feelings and failures with us, believing we are unfit and unworthy to be the objects of the Almighty’s unconditional love. Together, we read the litany of confession, naming all our shameful words and actions. And then we hear the impossible words of the assurance of pardon: As a father has compassion on his children, God has compassion on us. As a mother treasures her children, God also treasures us. Let us praise the Lord with all we have, for God is good! God’s mercy and love endures forever! Amen!
This is a love story – our love story. We may not understand it intellectually, but if we pay attention, we can feel it emotionally. The season of Lent offers us the chance to focus not on our unworthiness, but on God’s all surpassing love for us.
Yours in faith,
-Rev. Dr. Shawnthea Monroe